i'm sure black flag won't miss the bars i stole from'em.
Showing posts with label SPITTING. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SPITTING. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
more spit
SALIVA - the transparent watery fluid secreted by glands connected with the mouth. it keeps the mouth moist, and by mixing with the food during mastication makes of it a soft, pulpy mass, that is easily swallowed. it also changes the starchy elements into some kind of sugar.
***
SPIT HAIKU
s - a - t - a - n
he fills me up with much love
it comes out as spit.
spit on autobahn
want to go to germany
just for this purpose.
***
comments on spitting
joey called it unleashing the venom.
kate said i was just givin' the cops my dna.
fancy pants said to stop.
***
fancy pants did these haiku on spitting
please don't spit in stores
i'm scared you'll get arrested
public disturbance.
then you would freak out
on a cop and be tasered
and go to the pen.
cop killers get life
with no conjugals for fun
you'd have to turn gay.
***
***
SPIT HAIKU
s - a - t - a - n
he fills me up with much love
it comes out as spit.
spit on autobahn
want to go to germany
just for this purpose.
***
comments on spitting
joey called it unleashing the venom.
kate said i was just givin' the cops my dna.
fancy pants said to stop.
***
fancy pants did these haiku on spitting
please don't spit in stores
i'm scared you'll get arrested
public disturbance.
then you would freak out
on a cop and be tasered
and go to the pen.
cop killers get life
with no conjugals for fun
you'd have to turn gay.
***
Monday, April 9, 2007
the SPIT CHRONICLES pt.5
bank of america pt. 2
this was the last time i went into bank of america. i was tryin' to cash my paycheck on a friday afternoon. the bankteller says that because my driver's license is expired, they can't cash my check. so i yell into the intercom "does that mean it's not fuckin' me?". and she just repeats herself. i then then yell that this is bullshit & i speed around the front, park, & go inside. i just bypass the line of 10+ people & charge up the counter. i tell'em my name, & ask what the problem is. the manager comes out & tells me they're not gonna cash my check & that i need to leave. so i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the counter & take her advice on leavin'.
don't you wish there was a way you could show the SPIT CHRONICLES to yr friends without gettin' on the fuckin' computer? but wait, there is! the SPIT CHRONICLES is available in homemade bk form. it's way better than this computer shit. it has pictures, & a hardcover. shit, i'll even personalize it to you. all for only $10 dollars. just leave somethin' on the comments section, & we'll work somethin' out. trust me, it's worth it.
this was the last time i went into bank of america. i was tryin' to cash my paycheck on a friday afternoon. the bankteller says that because my driver's license is expired, they can't cash my check. so i yell into the intercom "does that mean it's not fuckin' me?". and she just repeats herself. i then then yell that this is bullshit & i speed around the front, park, & go inside. i just bypass the line of 10+ people & charge up the counter. i tell'em my name, & ask what the problem is. the manager comes out & tells me they're not gonna cash my check & that i need to leave. so i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the counter & take her advice on leavin'.
don't you wish there was a way you could show the SPIT CHRONICLES to yr friends without gettin' on the fuckin' computer? but wait, there is! the SPIT CHRONICLES is available in homemade bk form. it's way better than this computer shit. it has pictures, & a hardcover. shit, i'll even personalize it to you. all for only $10 dollars. just leave somethin' on the comments section, & we'll work somethin' out. trust me, it's worth it.
Thursday, April 5, 2007
the spit chronicles pt.4
bank of america pt.1
we were tryin' to move into our 2nd apartment. my whole family was helpin' us move. we had a huge trailer & multiple cars full of shit in the apartment parking lot. all we had to do was go to the bank & get the $ so we could get the keys to the apartment. so, i go down to the bank & they they tell me that my deposit hasn't posted. it should've posted 3 or 4 days ago. this means that we can't get the keys to the apartment yet. after talkin' to some lady, they decide that my $ should show up in 1 to 2 days. i very angrily explained my situation, & they wouldn't budge. then i decided to leave, but on my way out i spit a big ol' nasty thing on her glass walled office.
just to let you know, all of the spit chronicles is available in bk form. $10 each. now that's a freakin' bargain. it even has pictures. and other stuff connected to spit.
we were tryin' to move into our 2nd apartment. my whole family was helpin' us move. we had a huge trailer & multiple cars full of shit in the apartment parking lot. all we had to do was go to the bank & get the $ so we could get the keys to the apartment. so, i go down to the bank & they they tell me that my deposit hasn't posted. it should've posted 3 or 4 days ago. this means that we can't get the keys to the apartment yet. after talkin' to some lady, they decide that my $ should show up in 1 to 2 days. i very angrily explained my situation, & they wouldn't budge. then i decided to leave, but on my way out i spit a big ol' nasty thing on her glass walled office.
just to let you know, all of the spit chronicles is available in bk form. $10 each. now that's a freakin' bargain. it even has pictures. and other stuff connected to spit.
Monday, April 2, 2007
the SPIT CHRONICLES pt.3
WALGREEN'S
worked there for almost 5 years. it pretty much sucked the last 2 1/2 years. so i would do all kinds of ignorant obnoxious things to amuse myself. like this one monday mornin' i went on a tie strike (ties are stupid), & the asst. manager couldn't handle it anymore & threatened me into wearing my tie. then she complained that the counters were filthy. i explained that i've been off all weekend, & it was just the high schoolers workin' & i've been tryin' to clean up thier messes. also, it's not even 8.30 in the mornin' yet. so she yells for me to clean the counters. this is when i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the counter, & cleaned the counter with spit & my already filthy tie. sometimes i would make this lady so mad, that her nose would bleed.
worked there for almost 5 years. it pretty much sucked the last 2 1/2 years. so i would do all kinds of ignorant obnoxious things to amuse myself. like this one monday mornin' i went on a tie strike (ties are stupid), & the asst. manager couldn't handle it anymore & threatened me into wearing my tie. then she complained that the counters were filthy. i explained that i've been off all weekend, & it was just the high schoolers workin' & i've been tryin' to clean up thier messes. also, it's not even 8.30 in the mornin' yet. so she yells for me to clean the counters. this is when i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the counter, & cleaned the counter with spit & my already filthy tie. sometimes i would make this lady so mad, that her nose would bleed.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
the SPIT CHRONICLES pt.2
7-11
me & my friend bryan went to 7-11 for some late night 7-11 action. when we try to check out, the cashier asks for both our i.d.'s for bryan's cigarettes. i laugh & tell bryan that she loves havin' the authority to enforce stupid rules. the cashier then gets pissy & she says she's not gonna ring up my stuff. i tell'er that's bullshit. she then says to leave. so i leave. but on my way out, i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the door. she tells bryan that i'm nasty, & proceeds to call the cops. bryan manages to pay for his stuff, & we got in the car & hurried home.
the SPIT CHRONICLES are available to purchase in homemade book form. if interested, just leave somehin' on the comments section. trust me, it's worth it. there's pictures.
me & my friend bryan went to 7-11 for some late night 7-11 action. when we try to check out, the cashier asks for both our i.d.'s for bryan's cigarettes. i laugh & tell bryan that she loves havin' the authority to enforce stupid rules. the cashier then gets pissy & she says she's not gonna ring up my stuff. i tell'er that's bullshit. she then says to leave. so i leave. but on my way out, i spit a big ol' nasty thing on the door. she tells bryan that i'm nasty, & proceeds to call the cops. bryan manages to pay for his stuff, & we got in the car & hurried home.
the SPIT CHRONICLES are available to purchase in homemade book form. if interested, just leave somehin' on the comments section. trust me, it's worth it. there's pictures.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
SPIT CHRONICLES pt. 1
HOLLYWOOD VIDEO
we had rented some movies from hollywood video & didn't return them for a very long time. many months after returning them, we went there to buy some used videos. when i went to check out, they looked up my account, & told me that i had over $800 in late charges. they said i had to pay on the fine before i could rent again. so i explained that i wasn't renting, that i was just buyin' these videos & they needed to ring me up. they insisted that i pay at least some of the fine. i said that was fuckin' retarded, & that i wouldn't be dealin' with them ever again.
then i spit on their glass door, & we left. never to return.
all of the the SPIT CHRONICLES are available to purchase in homemade book form.
we had rented some movies from hollywood video & didn't return them for a very long time. many months after returning them, we went there to buy some used videos. when i went to check out, they looked up my account, & told me that i had over $800 in late charges. they said i had to pay on the fine before i could rent again. so i explained that i wasn't renting, that i was just buyin' these videos & they needed to ring me up. they insisted that i pay at least some of the fine. i said that was fuckin' retarded, & that i wouldn't be dealin' with them ever again.
then i spit on their glass door, & we left. never to return.
all of the the SPIT CHRONICLES are available to purchase in homemade book form.
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