GOD DAMN SON.

as we sat there
mindin' our own
some sort of walkin' talkin' street urchin
walks up, kneels before us,
makes false accusations of
us bein' hippies (he claimed "you can't hide it"),
then starts tellin' us this story
of a bear chasin'em through the
piney woods of nowhere &
him havin' to do the ol' zorro routine
with his fishin' pole to fight off the bear
(which apparently worked since he's here tellin' us his story & still has all parts of his body, minus the brain)
well, the chase somehow led to
him findin' these big ol' mushrooms
that he believed would allow you to
see the face of your creator
these things were fuckin' huge
(maybe as big around as the back tire to a tricycle & about as thick as my hand stacked on top of my other hand)
& were only gonna cost me 5 bucks each
not bad if they was the real deal, but
we declined his offer of
black death 'shrooms
at affordable discount prices
& away he went
but bein' the walkin' talkin' street urchin' he is,
he came right back up to us
& asked if he could purchase
a cigarette from one of us
for somethin' like 15 cents.

god damn.




lurve,
FAKE DADA

one small poem.

she said that
the reason she
don't vote is
that it makes
her life easier

this statment
caused somethin'
in my brain to snap
& shoot blood
out my nose.
***

possum that died by my hand.

fucker came
up in my
house & shit
causin' a ruckus

took over
an hour
& a brick

but i
killed
that
fucker.

THIS OLD MAN.

this picture was taken at the local high school football game.

this man is very old. he was in a wheelchair parked in the special wheelchair spot at the bottom of the bleachers in the walkway. i noticed he looked googly-eyed & weird. so i kept staring at him. since he was makin' sure to stare at every single person that walked in front of him, which was alot of fuckin' people, i felt justified. that fool's head was constantly jerkin' back & forth as if watchin' a japanese ping pong match. after a little while of gigglin' to myself, i realized that there were certain folk that this old man paid strict attention to. if you were a girl, you got stared at longer than most. if you were a girl ages 15 to early 20's, you REALLY got stared at. then as soon as they passed, his head would instantly fall with the weight of 3 bowling balls, and proceed to burn the image of their ass into his creepy old man memory.

tomorrow i'll be attending another game, & if i see this old man, i will plant myself direrctly behind him, & proceed to film him.

i was sittin' in someone's house that i don't really know.

she said:

"if we
weren't spendin'
all the $$$
on actor's
salaries,
the economy
wouldn't be so
fucked
up".

i believe
her to
really
believe
this statement.

folks
like this
scare the
shit
outta
me.

i almost didn't see him. *aka* the man who was sorta there.

i watched a man
cross the street.

he was wearing
a camo hat
camo shirt
camo shorts
& black army boots
with camo canvas
on top.

i almost didn't see him.

hankerin' for a bologna sandwich

about 5 miles down the highway, there's a little general store / cafe called "THE LAZY L. well i think the general store side is called "THE LAZY L", but the cafe side is called "lindsey's". we've ate at "lindsey's" many times over the past yr. that's where i discovered i love boudin. they also got really good bbq sandwiches, potato salad, mac & cheese out of the box, sometimes green beans, & mexican food. i usually get the bbq plate with sides. shit is tasty. well, we ate there the other night, but when we went to pay, we had to go to the register at the general store side. somethin' to do with the credit card machine. while we were payin' i was reminded that they have a deli meat case next to the register on the general store side. it's got bologna, salami, ham, & couple other meats i can't remember, & cheese. i noticed you could get a sandwich for 3 bucks. right then i decided that sometime within the next week i was gonna come up here & eat me a sandwich. so, i decide that today is the day for a garlic bologna sandwich from "THE LAZY L". i smoke a decent size bowl of pot, then hop in the car ready to fuckin' eat. i get there about 5 minutes later, & gawk at the deli case. the middle aged lady at the register asks, "what can i get you for, sir?". i quickly realize they ain't got no garlic bolgna. i answer back that i ain't sure yet. then i decide on salami, cut about as thick as my pinkie finger, with white american cheese & mustard. also got me some lay's potato chips, a coke, and my papa a bag of roasted peanuts. she slices the meat, makes the sandwich, & rings me up with a smile. i go take a seat at one of the booths, & begin to devour my meal, which was real fuckin' good. while i'm eatin', i'm readin' my bk, & listenin' to the extremely country accent comin' out of the little girl that works the bbq counter, we're pretty sure that she is daughter of the owner/cook. the owner/cook, who i think is named marion, is also very country, & looks like a total bad ass. he's got a button-up shirt tucked into jeans, cowboy boot, & a big ol' cowboy hat. well, right before i'm done eatin', a guy & a girl who look to be in their mid 20's come in askin' for marion. ol' country girl at the counter hollers to marion that someone wants to see him. he don't seem to hear so good, so the girls hollers this again but even louder. then yells that the police are here to see him, then chuckles. as soon as marion comes to the front, he looks at the couple, & asks "what ya'll need?". the girl says hi, looks around, raised up the back of her t-shirt, & pulls out a big ol' knife out of the back of her pants. she then asks marion if he'll hold onto it, to which he replies "how much ya'll needin' for it?". the girls says the need 30 bucks so they can go to lufkin & back & rambles somethin' about pickin' up somebody. sure seemed like drug money to me, but what the fuck do i know. marion grunts a little, then asks if they're actually gonna try & pick this back up & pay him back. he says "ya'll better come back for this, i ain't got no use for this & i don't want it." they assure him they'll pick it up within the week. then he hands her a piece of paper & a pen, & tells her to write down her name, how much she got for the knife, & when they'll pick it up. they get the 30 bucks, say thanks, & leave mumblin' to eachother. i wonder how often things like this happen at this establishment. how many folks know this guy will loan out a little cash for yr shit? i also wonder if the couple will come back for the knife. i don't think they will.

best convenience store in nacogdoches county

so about a 2 months ago i was drivin' home from work, & really needed a 7-up. so i stopped at the next store i found. it was called the P STORE. when i walked in i was blown away by the state of disarray that the store was in. the one candy rack had many empty boxes, & there was a nice coat of dust over the whole display. the one cooler, which wasn't very cold, had a pretty decent selection of soft drinks. boxes of merchandise were stacked everywhere. EVERYWHERE. also, sitting in front of the register was a very old man. he was tryin' his luck at some scratch off lotto tickets. the old man won somethin', but he wasn't sure what, & had the lady workin' the register shout what his winnings were. if yr wonderin', i think it was $5. so i find a can of 7-up & go to the register. at the register is this older asian lady, who's probably in her 60's, whisper ask if i needed anytning else, then tells me my total. while i was waitin' for her to figure out to how to function the fuckin' , i realize that there is also a complete fuckin' disaster behind the counter. there's many newspapers, all kinds of paper work spread out, quite a few empty soda cans, and some food containers. basically a fullout shitstorm of a mess. you can definitely tell that this lady is her own boss, & probably owns the store. i also notice behind the register over to the right is a huge magazine rack of hardcore porno mags. & i'm not talkin' 'bout playboy, neither. i'm talkin' hustler, juggs, gallery, swank, and many other hardcore titles i ain't never heard of. i make a mental note of this, pay for my drink, & leave. but not without noddin' to that old fuckin' man who's still examinin' his scratch off tickets. so, about a month later, i'm in need for some porno mags for a bk project i'm workin' on. i could go to shitass hasting's to get what i'm lookin' for, but i want an adventure out of this purchase & decide to go to the P STORE. i've decided that the P in P STORE stands for porn. i can't think of any other explanation. so, after work one day, i stop at the P STORE. still the same fuckin' mess i remember, but this time i think i saw an open porn mag amidst the mess. i grab a can of 7-up, & ask the lady if i can walk behind the counter to where the magazines are. she smiles, & says "of course" in a very heavy asian accent. so i do. holy crap, i didn't expect to see 2 other gigantic magazine racks fully stocked with porn mags. luckily, for me, they're all bundle packs. the first pkg i pick out has 2 copies of oui. but after a couple minutes of browsin', i see a a 3 pk of a magazine called gallery for the same price as the pkg of oui. so, i decide on that. well, while i'm diggin' thru the racks i see that there's a bunch of magazines boastin' that they have a free dvd. but, none of them actually have the dvd. then i notice that there's a small rack on the counter next to one of the magazine racks. guess what's on the rack. it's the free dvd's, but they are for sale. fuckin' genius. this old asian lady is a fuckin' genius. i'll say it again. fuckin' genius. these dvd's look fuckin' horribly disgusting. the only one i remember anything about had the title "asians suck black cock", & it had a picture of just that. an asian lady with a big black wang in her mouth. nothing about this picture was censored. so, i decide on what mags i'm gettin', & go pay for my 7-up & porn mags. she asks if i needed anything else, gives me my change, & then puts my mags in a nondescript brown paper bag, & tells me to have a good day. i tell'er to do the same, then head on home. this place fuckin' rules & i will be back.

for those who are readin' this & live in the area, it's on south street in nacogdoches.

also, one of the magazines was called 150 GAGGED WOMEN, & had a lady with a ball gag in her mouth. i figure the title is more than likely a good description for what to expect on it's pgs.

now here is a sample of haiku from the bk i'm workin' on. the bk is titled SEX.
***
my penis is red
from chronic masterbation
i refuse to stop.
***
first, i'll pet yr cat
& then i will lick yr cat
then i'll fuck yr cat.
***